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Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Inadequate

Most of the ideas for my blog posts come from random ideas that pop into my head throughout the day! This one, however, has come to me over and over again! One thing after another happened and now here I am blogging and venting about it!

I am so sick of feeling like the second choice. I honestly feel like I am not appreciated enough to be picked first! I am always a second choice, or worse, a last resort. 

I am so sick of feeling inadequate! I am sick of feeling like I am not good enough for anyone, both in my dating life (or lack thereof) and with my friends. 

I am sick of sitting by while my friends get date after date, guy after guy.

I am sick of being the shoulder to cry on, the listener for the venting and the advice giver! I think it's about my turn to be the one to cry, the one to vent, the one who receives advice.

I am so sick of seeing all of my friends getting engaged, married or having steady relationships! I can't help but think every single time, "WHEN THE HELL WILL IT BE MY TURN?!"

I am so sick of having to be the angel child all the time because my parent's are depending on it so much. They unknowingly have put so much pressure on me, I feel like I have to be a perfect child so they can concentrate on all the other kids rather than me.

Bottom line, I am sick and tired of being sick and tired! I just want things to work out for me JUST ONE FREAKING TIME! Why can't I get what I want just this once? Don't I deserve to be happy...? What have I ever done to make it so I don't deserve the good things in life?!